Teary Goodbyes, Happy Hellos

2012. This is it.

New Year's Eve is always one of my favorite parts of the holiday season. I feel like sometimes it doesn't get enough credit for how fantastic of a holiday it is. For the past five years I have been attending the annual Russ fire. This generally guarantees really tall structures that, when lit, become burning towers of pyromanic joy. If you want to know what I mean you should check out the videos here and here. Really. I'm serious. Go watch the videos.

This year was a tad on a lower key.  There was less in the way of tower height and people attending, and more in the way of fireworks. Which is also fantastic. I do not discriminate in my love and appreciation for explosions of any type. I leave that for people who understand big words and physics.

It was nice to spend the evening with a smaller group of people who I really love. I was in a bit of a funk for most the night. A funk which only got worse after getting marshmallow in my hair and then later accidentally burning off some of my hair. It was one of those times when all the little things weighing on my mind were given permission to break the surface at once. At one point I may have curled up into a ball, buried my head in my friend's chest, and shed a few tears. Which is always awkward for me, but it turned out alright.

2011 was an incredible year, one that I didn't let go of easily. Here are the highlights:

Baby: Going to Detroit to help welcome baby Andrew Rice into the world.

Medieval Times: Celebrating my little sister's 20th birthday with some good old fashioned jousting.

Disney: Reunion with Courtney and Israel. Eating lots of delicious foods, riding all my favorite rides, seeing all my favorite shows, and talking talking talking with some very dear friends. Glorious.

Shows: Going to Wicked with Mom and Adam. They loved it as much as I do. We may have sang Defying Gravity together once or twice on the way home.

South Africa: No one specific story or event, just all of it. The people, the places, the food, the UNIC, the everything. A piece of my heart has taken up permanent residence in Pretoria, South Africa and will live there forever more. I never thought I would grow so much, love a place so much, learn so much in that small of a time. There aren't really enough words to express how perfectly tailored this experience was for me and my needs at that specific time. Perfect.

EFY: The name-tag rebellion. Trying to determine if I ever have felt like a plastic bag. Harry Potter. New friends. The kids. The wonderful, smart, spiritual, good kids. The learning we did together. It was great. Believe, Hope, Edure that's all I got to say.

Provo: Julie. Hollie. Sean. Boyd and Lloyd, the best hometeachers and dear friends. Michelle. 191st ward. HELP International. Figuring out my life. Learning how to knit. Talking into the night. Doing Utah specific things. Jane Austen movies. Fall colors. All good.

Thanksgiving: Family, Friends, Muppets, and gluttony. 

Costa Rica: Vacation bliss. 

And now it's over. It went fast.

Maybe it's because everyone is growing up. Maybe it's because I'm graduating. Maybe it's because I'm going on a mission. Maybe it's because of a lot of things all together. All I know is that the end of a lot of things felt tangible as 11:59 turned to 12:00 and took away 2011 with it.

I'm grateful for good memories though, they add to the excitement of the future.  I'm trying to keep in mind what Jeffrey R. Holland said, "We look back to claim the embers from glowing experiences but not the ashes. And when we have learned what we need to learn and have brought with us the best that we have experienced, then we look ahead and remember that faith is always pointed toward the future. Faith always has to do with blessings and truths and events that will yet be efficacious in our lives." 

On the agenda for 2012 are a lot of unknowns. Graduation and mission are the only certainties. I don't exactly know what to expect with either endeavor, which made resolution making difficult this year. So I only have three:

1. Follow the Spirit

2. Be happy while I'm here, because there's no here there

3. Don't pick at zits

Sunday lessons: thou shalt think before you speak

I live in Utah these days. I know I've mentioned this before, but normally I'm teasing the state or myself when I mention that fact about my life. Today, however, I'm really happy that I live in Utah. Why, you ask? Five words: Music and the Spoken Word. That's why.

A Louisianan friend from efy found herself in Utah this weekend with a hankering for some MoTab. So we filled Gus with a couple more efyers and off to Temple Square we went. Let it be known that Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing as arranged by Mack Wilberg is my absolute favorite hymn at the moment; and today's broadcast closed with that song. The music filled my soul, found my pride, beat it to a pulp, then left me with the hope that I can be so much better than I currently am. "Here's my heart, Lord, take and seal it. Seal it for thy courts above." I am so grateful to have witnessed that presentation and to feel of the testimony shared there.

Utah, you have your perks.

In fact, Utah, since I'm being nice to you today I'll keep talking about how awesome spending Sunday on Temple Square is. It's stunning. You can't help but be completely overcome by the sheer majesty of the Salt Lake Temple. I admire and greatly appreciate the effort and sacrifices made by early saints to build a "sacred structure where the Lord could teach, guide, and bless" them and future saints.

The visitor's center, also great. It's filled with cute sister missionaries who are such pleasant company and great conversationalists. One even thought that we were all childhood friends, what a compliment. Then we listened to a presentation in Spanish, and I understood it! Happy day in the world? I think so

Another favorite from my Sunday on the Square was watching countless presentations of I'm a Mormon. They are incredibly uplifting stories of real people. Each story ended with the person explaining their different roles in life (fathers, mothers, teachers, publicists, professional football players, olympians, lawyers, friends, painters, etc.) followed by the standard quote "and, I'm a Mormon." Sometimes I couldn't contain myself and would follow up by cheering "yeah you are!" or "I just love him/her." I'm probably not the most reverent person alive, and I should probably learn to think before I speak seeing as this action repeated itself anywhere from three to seven different times. But, ya know, sometimes I can't help myself. My heart gets so full of happiness, and confidence, and triumph, and other goodness...and sometimes it has nowhere to go, so it comes out my mouth.

Stephanie, Michelle, and Sean you are absolutely wonderful. I'm so glad I spent my Sunday with you three. You are all amazing and inspiring people, and I definitely look up to each of you. Oh, and thanks a whole lot for putting up with my ridiculous nature.

Anyway, I guess all I'm trying to say is that my name is Jari Santos. I'm 22 and still learning to think before I speak, I love spending time with good friends at good places, I'm about to graduate and have no idea where my future is headed, I'm loud, I like to travel, I'm a halvsie, and I'm a Mormon.

(I'm sorry that I sound all kinds of crazy, bright-eyed and bushy tailed. But, hey, you're the one who stayed to read. So happy Sunday to you.)

alright, alright, alright, hey!

After South Africa I began the long trek home. 22 hours of travel is longer than any human should ever be forced to endure. I got home with enough time to unpack, do laundry, sleep, repack, and sleep a little bit more. Then I was off to Virginia for three weeks of efy. Eventually I was offered one last session in Amherst, Massachusetts making it one full month of efy madness.

EFY is an acronym that stands for Especially for Youth, and it is a week long summer program for youth ages 14-18 that focuses on uplifting participants based of the doctrines of the gospel as taught by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Basically we take a group of kids each week starting on Monday and sing, dance, teach, testify, and play all week long. Then we return them to their parents on Saturday with new friends, new perspective, and strengthened testimonies. It's a miracle program. I attended in 2004 and 2005 as a youth and started the counselor gig last summer. I liked it so much that I went back for more.

This year the theme was "Believe. Hope. Endure." It is difficult to regurgitate all the wonderful messages that were shared over the weeks, so forgive me for not trying. I will simply say that I am so grateful for opportunities to serve and forget myself. I know that as I make it a priority to assist others and fill their needs the Lord takes care of me.

Highlights of efy month:

• Happy Birfday Amurica Orientation Dance!
• Jared, the boy who was just old enough to make the age cut. He taught me not to take life too seriously
• Having my girls bolt across the field, screaming my name just to come give me a hi-five
• My kids referring to themselves as Jar-ites
• Jowling every Wednesday night
• Seeking the good
• Secret service for fellow counselors
• Someone re-rewriting the words from "Jar of Hearts" to "Jari of One Heart"
• Offering a challenge and not thinking it would be a huge deal, then finding out it changed things for someone: Pray to know the Book of Mormon is true, I promise you'll get an answer
• Sharing dreams
• Celebrating random holidays every day
• Stop and stare flash mobs at dances
• Remembering how awkward it is to be a teenager
• Finding out that a girl has a balloon phobia...as balloons are falling from the sky
• Adele karaoke, followed by Taylor Swift karaoke
• Having the company name "Pass the Immortality"
• Having prayers answered by the service of others. A specific thank you to Jenna Aldridge, Michelle Walker, Kristen Ford, and Esther Harsh. You women amaze and inspire me.
• My kids telling me that I would be the coolest mom ever...still haven't decided how I feel about that comment
• Making up a new ridiculous dance move, and having people incorporate it. By next summer the Bernie will be out and the Jari will be in!
• Counselor slide shows
• Finding a roommate and new friends for Utah
• Being reunited with people from Southeast
• Finding a sauce packet from Taco Bell that said "roadtrip" while on a roadtrip
• At testimony meeting when kids say things like "Normally when I feel the spirit I get a warm fuzzy feeling, but right now it's like a giant teddy bear giving me CPR."

I loved every single person that I worked with and every participant I worked for. I am so grateful for your examples, for your patience, for your friendship, and for your spirit. If any of your are reading I want you to know that I have a testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ, I know it is true. I know the Book of Mormon testifies of Christ and as you read it your relationship with your Savior will grow and you will feel loved. I know that Heavenly Father knows us perfectly. I know that he understands our full potential and offers guidance and direction as we strive to reach it. I know that as we work to keep commandments and hold true to our standards that we receive blessings, even if we cannot see them at the time. It is my prayer that you will each remember that you are a Child of God with divine potential and purpose. Have faith and believe in Christ. Exercise hope through the atonement of Christ, with an expectation that as you do what is right and repent when needed that you will receive every promised blessing. And as trials and afflictions come remember to endure them with humility and patience.

efy, you're just great! Thank you for a splendid summer.

Summer Sunshine

I just realized today that my summer is more than half over, and I've barely documented any of it. So here it is in the brief :

I went to Mexico, Guatemala, and Belize for a Travel Study program. Basically the coolest experience of my life. Some highlights you ask? I hiked a volcano (it erupted two weeks later), snorkeled in a torrential rainstorm, got stopped by some Zappatistas, hand fed a howler monkey, zip lined over one of the seven wonders of the world, saw lots of ruin sites, parasailed with an old man....and a million more things

Then I headed back to Idaho, threw Annalee a couple bridal showers, visited Timber in Oakley Idaho and hiked in City of Rocks, hung out with Bruce, reunited with a few of the 206 girls and ran a million errands. It was lovely.

Then I headed off to Chicago to be with my Disney friends Courtney and Israel who I hadn't seen in a year and a half, plus I'd never been to Chicago.

And now I'm in Florida. It really hasn't been that interesting since my return. I've seen a couple friends here and there, but mostly I've just bummed around the house. I went to Kansas City to see Annalee complete her term as National Post Secondary President of the club SkillsUSA. That was a fun trip, and it was really cool to see all the hard work that she has put into that organization, and how empowering of a group it is for those kids.

The most recent of my adventures has been EFY, a church camp for youth from ages 14-18. They spend a week in the care of young single adult counselors; during the week they attend religious classes, play games, go to dances, and basically just have a rockin week. I was able to be a counselor, I was over a group of 10 girls most of which were 16-17ish. My co-counselor, Matt, was amazing! He was over 10 boys who were the same age as the girls. As a company we played, laughed, learned, and taught together. I was able to share my testimony of the truthfulness of the gospel of Jesus Christ (more information can be found here) and help build the testimonies of these youth. They were amazing, and SO energetic. I loved every minute of my week, and would give ANYTHING to get to do it over again!