Life Lately

Let's jump back to December for just a moment. I was trying to make a lot of difficult life choices back then. One day I was applying for grad programs, the next I was going to work as a country director for HELP International, another day I would be making elaborate travel plans, and a day later I was on to something else. The whole process was becoming exhausting, this was especially true for my parents. One day my dad called me and said frankly (more frankly than I would have liked) "Jari, you're 22 years old. It's time to grow up and make a decision so pick whichever one is right and stick to it. You're done flip-flopping around." So I thought a lot about it, I prayed about it, and that night I decided that the plan that I liked best, and the one that felt the most right was to serve as a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. So that's what I am doing. On May 16th I will report to the Missionary Training Center in Provo, Utah then approximately 9 weeks later I will head to the Morristown, New Jersey Mission. So there you have it, I am capable of making decisions and I'm rather excited about this one.

Since I am reporting just a little over a month from when I graduated I decided to play pretty much the entire time in-between the two. First stop, Utah. I only stayed two days but I was able to visit with some of my most favorite people chatting, eating, and enjoying the lovely spring weather. Brenna made a delicious Easter dinner, Michelle taught me how to skip a rock, Holly and I had a lovely chat, and Sean even recounted all his favorite things about Utah and college life. Those were three days well spent. 

Second stop, Chicago. I wanted to spend time with my dear friend, Courtney. She is getting married in August to another friend of mine, Israel. Since I decided to serve a mission I will no longer be able to stand as her bridesmaid which breaks my heart. I still wanted to be a small part of the planning and see her before I left. We spent the week trying food and exploring the venue for her reception, shopping for dresses with the bridesmaids, laughing at wedding comedy movies in the man cave, baking treats, and oohing and awing over shoes, cakes, and Ryan Gosling. I adore Courtney and her family, they are so fun-loving and easy to get along with. Thank you again Shade family for letting me join in on the fun for a week. 

Now I'm home in perfect, sunny, wonderful Florida. About a week ago my aunt and uncle flew in from Brazil so we headed off to the emerald coast for five days. Make that 7 Brazilians, 3 Americans, 4 Halvsies, and 1 RV. It was a party. Lots of beach volleyball, frescoball, fruit, golden corral stops, made up sign language/English/Portuguese/Spanish communication, singing, and lots of laughing. I'm rather fond of hanging out with my huge, crazy family. Of course there is no such thing as a vacation without an adventure, so it shouldn't have been a surprise when the RV broke down for a little bit. Luckily everything got fixed and we were able to all travel back home together, and we definitely made the most of it. You haven't lived until you've had a traveling karaoke night complete with dance instruction courtesy of my father. It was a happy vacation full of sweet memories and gorgeous scenery. I'm so lucky to live in such a beautiful state. 

You would think that maybe I'd slow down for just a second, but that would be completely out of character. The first night back from the beach my family "surprised" me with tickets to the Lion King Broadway tour. I'm terrible about finding out about surprises just barely too early, but at least we had an extra ticket and were able to surprise Blake's mom, Liz. Surprise or not the show was beautiful. The Lion King has always been one of my favorite movies, and the show was just that more striking and emotional. Personally I feel that there are so many levels past entertainment and towards spiritual that the story line is capable of covering. If you ever have a chance it see to I would definitely recommend it. 

And the adventure continues...

Before the 16th the agenda still includes a Honduran dinner, two Brazilian dinners (can you tell my family is into food), scuba diving, blueberry picking, and a little Utahan get together with some family there. Life lately is pretty good. 

Pura Vida

The last of my Utah days were spent eating all kinds of delicious foods, dancing, laughing, knitting, visiting typical Provo places, and staying up until the wee hours of the morning with my favorite friends. Not much to report, just that it was lovely. It was like TV life...expect for the part where everyone was drowning in finals week horror and I made myself into a constant distraction. Oh well.

On the 13th Provo decided to snow, and I decided to peace out. I boarded a big plane that brought me back to the land of sunshine, bliss, and clammy hands and feet. I finally got to see Blake and Annalee's new place in Miami and meet my niece, Bogie, the flying squirrel. They also took me to eat baleadas for the first time. All I have to say is thank you Honduras! Then I passed out in the back of their car and they drove me to my parents house in Belleview.

We were supposed to leave for Costa Rica the next day. Everyone woke up, sort of got their bags packed, and Dad was even ready to go by 10:30. But, a bank mishap, some traffic, and a bad stewardess later we had missed our flight. So we spent the evening roaming Orlando instead. We hit up Golden Corral and the outlet mall...which probably made us look very much like Brazilian tourists. Then finished off with a bell choir, Christmas decorations, and fireworks at Disney's Grand Floridian Resort. When in doubt Disney property always has something that will brighten your day. We went to bed happy, and tried the airport thing again the next morning. We made it that time.

It's fun landing in places where you disembark the plane outdoors using those too-narrow, stand-up stairs. It's fun being a little too warm in December. It's fun having your passport checked in a country where the workers don't stare at and interrogate you like you just threatened everything dear to them. It's fun having a short man shout out your family name to which your oh-so-tourist-looking mother responds. Thus causing a rush of workers to whisk away your bags while you wonder whether or not you'll ever see them again. It's fun renting a mini van where the middle bench is completely detached from the rest of the car. It's fun showing up at a resort where they think your reservation has been canceled. It's fun having everything taken care of while you eat in the sun. It's fun being in Costa Rica.

During the week we floated around on the waves, watched as Blake made friends with all the iguanas and pizotes, attempted to convince our new Costa Rican friends that snow is the most terrible thing on earth, ordered lots and lots of flat iron steak and tres leches cake, went exploring on different rocks, watched Italian soap operas, and slept, and laughed, and got sunburnt, and climbed trees, and looked at stars, and spoke gringo, and drank virgin everything, and slept, and tried to convince my dad that vacations aren't so bad after all.

One of the highlights of the trip, for me anyway, was scuba diving at the Catalina Islands. I just recently got certified and this was my first time not in a pool or a crater in Utah. I was excited, and I was not let down. I'm terrible at remembering names of fish, sharks, and rays, but we saw some of them all while being tossed around by the current. It was great. Apparently the visibility wasn't fantastic, but I don't really have much to compare to. All I know is that being underwater with nothing to listen to but the sound of your breathing...it's glory. There's nothing to disturb your thoughts, everything to see is new and exciting, and in a non-verbal way there are people to share it with. Then there's the boat ride. Cruising along in the sunshine on the deep blue water and seeing the different views of somewhere you've never been while listening to the random conversations of strangers is happy. Really, it's one of those things that watching as an outsider looks like a fantastic time; and when you're the one living it, it's even better!

My only disappointment is that it took me so long to get certified. This is a beautiful hobby and I highly recommend it. The only downside is that now all I want to do is get back in the water and I don't exactly have the funds to support that desire. So I'll just dream until next time.

The vacation finished out nicely. We even made our flight home with no problems. I got stuck sitting next to a couple beer crazed, California-beach-bum-wannabees, but there are worse things in life. Overall I'm going to have to rack this up as an absolute success.

The Cirlce of Life

I love the Lion King. My sister and I even had matching Simba and Nala t-shirts when we were little; we wore them to do our Barbie Workout exercise video...but that's another story. The only reason I mention the Lion King is because there will probably be a shameless reference to that movie somewhere in this post. I thought you should be prepared.

So with with that said, I give you my trip to Kruger National Park:

My mom and brother came to South Africa to tour around a little before I had to return home. The Kruger National Park was top on our list. This park is big. Really big. 7,523 square miles big to be exact. We were only able to see a small part of it; but even so we were introduced to some of the greatest beauties of my life.

Whenever I say the word "safari" I assume that your minds will conjure images of big trucks and men in hats, khaki shorts, and long socks; and those tour options are available. However, the majority of our trip was spent in our own car driving down whichever road caught our fancy, and hoping that we would see something wild or exotic as we went.

We were royally fortunate.

I do not have the time to recount each wonder that we were a part of. I will focus on the highlight of our trip instead. On our third day after hours of driving and seeing nothing but trees, rocks, and impala the frustrations of being in a car with the same company were beginning to take a toll. We were nearing our destination for that evening and it seemed as though we wouldn't see much before that point. Then an old man drove past and motioned for us to roll down our window, he told us that up the road were three lionesses hunting.

We hadn't seen a single lion yet and the news alone was enough to change our mood, and fill us with new excitement. Another three minutes of driving and we saw the first lioness on our left side. She was close enough that if I really wanted to I could have thrown my muffin out the window and hit her, and I have terrible aim. She was strong, focused, and absolutely captivating. Every muscle in her body was tense and every move she made calculated. For me the most impressive thing was to watch her walk. I instantly understood why lions are considered royalty. She walked with power and command. She knew her purpose and nothing could distract her.

Eventually we left her and drove up a little further to find the game she was pursuing. Our hope was that if we were patient enough we may be audience to the grand event, the chase. Another few minutes passed before second lioness appeared on our right. She was equally as determined as the first. The row of cars were not to annoy her, in fact she used their camouflage to her advantage. Slowly and meditatively she made a large circle around until she was facing the unknowing zebras from the opposite side of her partner. She kept low to the ground using her surroundings to hide herself. Her movements we so quick and perfect that if you blinked you would lose sight of her.

All that was left to do was wait. The row of cars had turned off their engines, the cameras had stopped flashing, everything was silent. The anticipation was tangible. Then it came, the roar. You think it would sound familiar after all those discovery channel specials, but it didn't. I can't even explain the sound. It pricked my heart more than it did my ears. It was the part that lingered as the scene in front of me became a blur. The zebras reared and bolted with the lioness at their heels. In a matter of seconds their direction led them to a small valley which concealed them from our sight. A sort of gurgling sound followed, confirming their death, and the end of the chase.

It was an emotional experience. One that all of us felt the need to retell over and over in different ways before our minds and hearts had fully processed it. For me the roar is still the part that stirs me most, the signal that the chase had begun. It was issued with a type of confidence and tenacity that I was unfamiliar with. There was no doubt that she would kill, but even so it wasn't a violent or hateful sound like a war-cry. It was just bold confidence that filled the space.

The next night was our last in the park, and I found myself sitting outside wrapped up in a blanket thinking about all the different things I had seen and been a part of. Not just on the trip, but in my time in South Africa on the whole.

(Now is where I shamelessly incorporate Disney into my life) As I was sitting out there I noticed that Pumba was wrong in his description of the night sky in Africa. It is not bluish-black. It is utterly and completely black. The darkness of it made the stars seem brighter. The stars are different as well. I started by looking at just one star; and at first I thought it was an airplane because it was blinking so frequently. Not so. The stars in Africa don't just shimmer, they truly twinkle just like the song says. I have admired many different night skies, but this was drastically different. I didn't even realize that such a sky could exist outside of music, movies, or literature.

It was a little overwhelming to be surrounded my so much beauty. Especially when my next thought came in the voice of Mufasa:

"You have forgotten who you are and so have forgotten me. Look inside yourself, Simba. You are more than what you have become."

Try putting that phrase to context in your own life, it's a little trippy and disheartening. But, as I was coming to the end of my grand adventure it was nice to be reminded that I have so much potential to be great. I don't have time to be distracted and forget who I am or what I am capable of becoming.

So in that moment I decided that I want to be like Simba after his glorious self-actualization when he's running through the desert to claim his rightful place and destiny...a choir singing me on wouldn't be too bad either.

I can be alone, I can watch a sunset on my own

A little history: I've never been someone who enjoys being alone. Even when I'm furious or annoyed with everyone around me I'd still much rather have them near me than be alone. Vacation is a time when I particularly hate being alone and have passed up tons of opportunities to visit interesting places or do exciting things for the simple fact that I would have to do them alone.

But, there comes a time in everyone's life when they must face their fears. Considering that from the moment I stepped foot in South Africa the number one question everyone asked was when I would be visiting Kruger or Cape Town I decided that my time had come, and off to Cape Town I went.

Wednesday (way back on June 15th) was my last day as an intern and I celebrated by staying up late watching movies with friends before catching a 6 am flight the next morning. A wise decision? Probably not. Do I regret it? Definitely not. After waking up slightly later than planned and running into some slow gas station attendants we made it the airport in enough time for me to run through security and reach my gate as the last person on board. I slept the whole flight with my head cradled on the shoulder of the person next to me. I love that air travelers are nice to strangers, and don't say anything when my sleeping habits invade their personal space.

Christine's son, Andre, and his family live in Cape Town and were nice enough to let me stay with them while I was there. They drove me around, took me to see old cannons, introduced me to new movies, fed me well, and kept me giggling the whole weekend. I could go on and on about how much I loved this family, but the point of this post is that I went on vacation alone. So let's fast forward to that part.

Have you ever heard of "Red Bus Tours?" I became well acquainted with them. Being that I didn't have my own mode of transportation I hopped on the big, red, Ms. Frizzle looking vehicle and turned my life over to their tour savvy ways. The top attraction on my list was Table Mountain, and I knew I had to get there when the weather was in my favor, which seemed a little tricky on that blustery day. However, the heavens were kind to me and I was granted a couple hours of sunlit exploration at the top of the mountain. I felt like Maria from the Sound of Music skipping about (and yes, singing) as I took in the incredible beauty of this earth. To be completely honest there aren't adequate words to tell you what it felt like to experience each scene as I walked along. "Majestic" only somewhat describes it. One of my favorite things about being up there was that as the wind brought in fog it felt like I was being whisked away to a mystical and somewhat eerie land. I only let myself bask in that Narnia-esque fantasy for a little bit before I decided I should get back on the cable car before the weather got really bad and I was left to walk down instead.

The next stop for the bus surprised me. Out of nowhere I was at this gorgeous beach front with Table Mountain standing there as my backdrop. I had other places that I wanted to see, but my Floridian heart couldn't say no to sand and salt water just sitting there begging to be explored. The water was disgustingly cold, but there were plenty of rocks I could stand on which let me get close enough without actually having to touch the icy stuff. There are few sounds in the world that I find as soothing as crashing waves, so I just sat there for a while listening and day dreaming. Nothing truly special happened there, I just felt completely at home, which is a nice feeling when you are actually 7855.8 miles (or 12642.6 kilometers) from home.

From there I went to St. George's Cathedral. When I first got there I saw a sign directing to the courtyard and the labyrinth. If you are anything like me the word labyrinth brings with it images of David Bowie with a super mullet, muppets, and songs about dancing babies. I was completely confused about why a labyrinth was in a church and I was intrigued. When I got to the courtyard all I found was a cobblestone floor that had used different color stones to trace out a labyrinth in the center. I decided to see if I could find my way to the heart of the maze, and started walking. It was interesting how meditative that walk was. My thoughts were focused and prayerful, which was something my mind had been lacking in the weeks prior. I found out later that walking a labyrinth in that manner is called praying with your feet. One of the happiest discoveries of my life.

By this point in my day I was tuckered out, which is a bad choice when you are walking around aimlessly in an unknown area. I took random bus stops, bought way too much merchandise at terrible prices from a sweet old lady in the market who won my heart, and I made friends with a man named David then fell asleep mid conversation with him, oops.

I ended everything with a fish dinner while looking out on the water and listening to a group of men sing and play drums on the street.

Moral of the story: I can have fun all by myself, and now nothing can stop me!

[cue cutesy girl-power music and fade to black]

Family Matters

I am a member of a dysfunctional family. Now, I say that with all the love and adoration that is generally reserved to describe a sleeping baby or a cute puppy, and I love everyone I’m related to more than anything. But seriously, we’re nuts. However, it is the harebrained environment in which I was raised that helped create the person I am now.

Me and Daddy-O, dancing of course.

My dad is king of the crazies. He seldom sleeps or takes a day off work. He is a huge fan of kicking his leg up to his head when he’s excited about something, or whenever there’s a camera on him. He has a tendency to break into song, usually something by Cher or Madonna. He is smart, loud, sweet, and hyperactive. My dad taught me how to debate, how to see beauty within myself, how to dance like nobody’s watching and sing like nobody can hear (I realize that those are probably song lyrics and make me sound super cliché, but I mean it!), he taught me how to study, how to defend myself, he taught me to have passion, how to be aware of myself, how to be responsible…I could go on and on.

Me and the lady, right after parasailing. She's adventurous, it's true.

My mother is an angel. She puts up with all the insanity our small family provides. She’s the calm one, she’s the rock. She’s stubborn, hardworking, and takes time to enjoy the small things in life. She taught me how to love, even when it’s hard. She taught me how to cook, how to be brave, how to enjoy adventure, how to cherish home, how to depend on family and be dependable to them, she taught me that I don’t have to be the best at everything but I do have to try my best at everything, she taught me to never quit. She has supported me in everything I do in life, and not only tells me that I can do anything, but also truly believes that I can.

All but one of the siblings. This photo started with us standing a normal distance apart, then the photographer asked if we were close, being cousins and all, the hugging was our response.

Then there are my siblings. Biologically I only have two. I claim seven: Annalee and Adam (the actual ones), Lala, Junior, Gigi, Amanda, and Germania. The last five lived with us off and on throughout my growing up. These are the people that I played and fought with. The ones that I wanted to be like when I was older, the ones I still try to emulate now. These are the people who I would build forts with, play cops and robbers with, sneak ice cream from the freezer with. The ones I would pray for by my bed at night. Now that I’m older they’re the ones I go on vacation to visit, the ones I tell stories to my roommates about, the ones who listen to me cry, who listen to and influence my goals, and who make me laugh. I could not ask for better people in my life.

Then there is my extended family. I won’t go into detail. Let’s just say there are lots of stories. I have an uncle who lived in the Amazon, a grandma who faked like her cane was a gun to scar away a robber, an aunt who runs half marathons, another aunt who gives me great books to read and who justifies my quasi-feminist tendencies, another uncle who builds his kids miniature monster trucks, another aunt who takes ridiculous amounts of pictures and is prone to making friends with strangers regardless of the occasional language barrier…

The moral of the story is that I adore my family. I recognize that they are my backbone. Now for the part where this ties in with “the quest.” Mostly I just realized how much I take my family for granted. I love them. My family is an enormous part of who I am. Sometimes I get the "bright" idea to try and detach myself from that fact. However, now more than ever I have realized that is stupid. Why would I ever want to be detached from such wonderful, ambitious, and inspiring people? I wouldn't, I don't. So instead of pointing out their faults and trying desperately to separate myself from them I'm just embracing it. More than that I'm going to take time to appreciate them each. We'll see where this takes me.

My Best Friend

This Girl:

is my best friend!

She are and I are 16ish months apart, but really we might as well have been twins. We don't look much alike, and our personalities are definitely different, but she understands me in a way that nobody else on this earth does. She is not afraid to tell me I'm wrong or to hold me to a higher standard, because she always wants what's best for me. She listens to me when I complain about ridiculous things, and sometimes does ridiculous things with me. Together we've gone to Brazil, tackled long road trips, hiked red rock mountains, had Anastasia themed sleepovers, laughed, cried, and grown. I could not ask for a better sister or a better friend. She will always be my role model because she is a woman who courageously stands for what is right, she is smart beyond belief, and she has the biggest heart. Having her in my life has helped me grow into the person I am now, and she has given me vision for the person I hope to shape myself into in the future.

Now she is married to the man of her dreams. She has a new last name, a new place to call home, and a new person that she spends all her time with. However some things never change.

Annalee will always be my little sister, the girl I look up to (literally and figuratively), she will always be my best friend.

Summer Sunshine

I just realized today that my summer is more than half over, and I've barely documented any of it. So here it is in the brief :

I went to Mexico, Guatemala, and Belize for a Travel Study program. Basically the coolest experience of my life. Some highlights you ask? I hiked a volcano (it erupted two weeks later), snorkeled in a torrential rainstorm, got stopped by some Zappatistas, hand fed a howler monkey, zip lined over one of the seven wonders of the world, saw lots of ruin sites, parasailed with an old man....and a million more things

Then I headed back to Idaho, threw Annalee a couple bridal showers, visited Timber in Oakley Idaho and hiked in City of Rocks, hung out with Bruce, reunited with a few of the 206 girls and ran a million errands. It was lovely.

Then I headed off to Chicago to be with my Disney friends Courtney and Israel who I hadn't seen in a year and a half, plus I'd never been to Chicago.

And now I'm in Florida. It really hasn't been that interesting since my return. I've seen a couple friends here and there, but mostly I've just bummed around the house. I went to Kansas City to see Annalee complete her term as National Post Secondary President of the club SkillsUSA. That was a fun trip, and it was really cool to see all the hard work that she has put into that organization, and how empowering of a group it is for those kids.

The most recent of my adventures has been EFY, a church camp for youth from ages 14-18. They spend a week in the care of young single adult counselors; during the week they attend religious classes, play games, go to dances, and basically just have a rockin week. I was able to be a counselor, I was over a group of 10 girls most of which were 16-17ish. My co-counselor, Matt, was amazing! He was over 10 boys who were the same age as the girls. As a company we played, laughed, learned, and taught together. I was able to share my testimony of the truthfulness of the gospel of Jesus Christ (more information can be found here) and help build the testimonies of these youth. They were amazing, and SO energetic. I loved every minute of my week, and would give ANYTHING to get to do it over again!